Let Go

Let go

Oh sultry summer heat,
Do you not know?
Your allowed time has passed,
You must flee, you must go.
It is time for the cool and crisp to awake,
We desire a big cleansing breath to take.
We have adorned our dwellings with emblems of Fall,
We are stocked with spices and scents of it all.
Nature is painting with colors of splendor,
creatures are prepping for the impending November.
Right at our doorstep sweet October knocks,
The birds have assembled
to journey their flocks.
You are no longer welcome,
So off you must fly.
Let go, torrid summer,
We bid you goodbye.

By: JLE, Sept 29, 2019

On Love and Hate

I will never forget a story I once heard from a street preacher . He told of his experience on the streets of the most dangerous areas of NYC , telling people that God loved them, and an encounter with a young gang member who threatened his life with a knife if he didn’t take his message elsewhere. He told how he looked that young man straight in the eye and said: “ you can cut me into 100 pieces, and every single one of those pieces will still cry out from the pavement , that God loves you . That impacted me so much . If it’s “God loves you” or “I love you” the idea is the same . Can humans perfect this ? No, not until we reach a higher spiritual level than most of the human race is currently at . Few people have walked the earth to this day that could lay claim to real unconditional love, Jesus of Nazareth being one of them, but this kind of love is and should be the Gold standard we hold up, and every day we fail at it we can get back up and try again . Humans need more love, but first humans need more humility, to realize we all contribute the the problem . The hypocrisy of the day astounds me. It makes me realize just how primitive we still are. I sometimes feel when I step way back the human race resembles one big giant narcissist. Sure there are lots of truly loving caring souls out there. But isn’t one whole greater than the sum of its parts. Then wouldnt the whole problem be greater than the sum of its parts. Until we look within ourselves not outside of ourselves  to conquer the hatred we will spin around and around in the same whirlpool. 

I believe there is no shame in being patriotic and proud of your country, though no country is perfect, this is mine, and I stand for my flag , and show respect for our leaders .

I think politics is a nasty business and a constant struggle for power, therefore corruption will always exist on all sides so long as the human ego is involved .

I do not trust the modern mainstream media . Political interests have spoiled fair factual and unbiased journalism which is sadly a thing of the past .

I believe in listening to all sides of an issue with an open mind and drawing my own conclusions, not jumping on bandwagons and always running with the crowd .

I think our emotions are our biggest deterrent to making informed decisions as to where we stand on an issue, what and who we believe, and whom we support or don’t . If we find ourselves highly emotional, we are not thinking clearly . It’s the basis of hate, bias anger and bigotry .

Speaking of bigotry, it is a tangled web that is not one directional but runs in all directions, and we all must work toward conquering our own personal prejudices, because it is an element of the flawed human condition, to fear what is different and unfamiliar.

Though I don’t always understand the lifestyles of others, I do believe we should all be free to live, marry or blend our lives with anyone we choose regardless of race, religion, cultural background or gender .

I believe in women’s rights in all areas, however, I am Pro- life when it comes to the unborn child . Not because I don’t support a woman’s right to chose what to do with her body, but because I believe an unborn child is a separate life from that body who has rights as well . Firstly the right to life .

I believe in the second amendment, and the preservation of our right to bear arms, but I also believe there is no need for the average citizen to have assault type weapons. Especially if the freedom of citizens to own one, is posing a threat to the innocents in our society.

I always am postured in support of the helpers and protectors in our society. Law enforcement, our military, first responders. Humans are flawed, there will always be bad actors and those who fail to uphold their responsibility. It does not change my respect and reverence for those who are willing to risk their lives and safety to protect the innocents.

I love that America is a country of immigrants. I am the offspring of immigrants . I am proud of my ancestors who came here for a better life . I am also proud that their contribution and devotion to this country helped make it an awesome nation. I believe this is what immigrating here should be. Done legally, with the desire to contribute to and embrace the values of a nation others come to because of the love they have for it . Coming to America should equal the desire to be American. Not forgetting our heritage, but embracing our new one with pride and teaching our children who are born here to honor and respect it . In a perfect world, I can visualize a border- less planet . But this is not a perfect world, and if we want to preserve our freedom and our way of life, borders are necessary and a legal process to come here is critical .

I think each citizen of this nation has a responsibility to do his best to make his own way in life . To provide for himself, his/her family , to contribute something to society.

I don’t believe anyone is responsible for my success but me. I think all citizens should have equal access to the tools needed and opportunities to succeed in life but it is up to each and every one of us to avail ourselves of those opportunities and strive toward that success, and if we fail to, we are not owed anything by anyone. However I do believe we all have a moral responsibility to help others in need. Charity should mostly come from our neighbors communities and churches. Not regulated by government . Governments should govern. Not dictate our morals .

Moral codes have its roots in the human’s belief in accountability to a higher power, or our creator . This is faith .

I believe Faith is personal. Each person should honor and respect the faith of others and government should not interfere or make laws attempting to restrict, control or discredit the faiths of its citizens or the practice thereof . So long as that faith does not require one to do harm to, or infringe upon the freedom of others to practice their beliefs accordingly .

I do not believe any race , or group of people should be held accountable for the injustices of our forefathers. Every race, nationality, religion, cultural group, every generation, has faced hardship, injustice, suffering at the hands of others because of the flawed human condition . The healing comes through Love, Forgiveness, Moving forward and not repeating mistakes of the past .

This week throngs of young people will walk across a stage to accept their diploma’s as they graduate from high school and enter in the world that calls them adults, going off to college or to work or whatever their destiny calls for. This Grandmother is celebrating the accomplishment of one particular young man this week. For this young man was born on January 23 in the year 2000 into what society might consider a,  “not so ideal” family circumstance. Born of a young single Mom, you would assume his life challenges began right there. But this young man was one of the lucky ones. For His Mom was a young woman of strength and resilience. A product of a line of strong and resilient women as her own Mother and Grandmother were, including her older sister who were all there to welcome this young man into the world. Yes, the early years were faced with challenges and sometimes hardship but his Mom’s selfless and undying love for him was no match for any of life hurdles they had to face. And then as luck would have it, or as was destined from the beginning, however you want to look at it, his Mom met someone who would be an intricate part of what the future would hold for him. A man who was truly one of a kind, and with careful thought and consideration his Mom welcomed him into their lives and allowed him to step into the role of Dad. Yes I say again , he was one of the lucky ones. Because he couldn’t have had a better team to raise him to adulthood. Their tireless efforts, and love and devotion to his success clearly became evident as he grew up in every aspect of his life. And today, the young man, son, big brother, he has become is the fruit of the efforts of his parents, family, support system and all those who know and love him. We are proud, but we are also eternally grateful for those who have poured themselves into the life of this young adult. His Mom, My daughter, can rest her head on her pillow this week knowing she has done her job as a mother, and then some. We can all be reminded in gratitude to my late Son In Law Jerry, for the selfless efforts, love and support and fatherly wisdom he imparted. He could not have asked for a better  example of a good man and productive member of society.  Godspeed into adulthood my dear Grandson Tyler James. We can’t wait to see what life holds for you. You are truly one of the lucky ones.

Rest in Peace

My biological Dad passed away this week. April 1st 2018 to be exact. I did not find out until two days after. Apparently the very small family that is left of the descendants of Dominic and Celia Carlo could not get in touch with me right away. But I did manage to get to New York for his final wake and funeral. We were not close like most Fathers and Daughters most of my life for a host of complicated reasons, but never really anger or resentment on either of our parts. We never had harsh words with one another. My feelings about our relationship took many forms throughout my life but most importantly in recent years they were best described this way. He was who he was. He could have done better by me. But later in life he knew it, and tried his best to apologize. I know he loved me. And I loved him just the way he was. Simply because he was my Father. Yet another exercise in forgiveness, which always ends well for me.

Death has touched me personally more these past two years than in my entire lifetime. I am learning about grief in all of its forms and varying intensities. The loss of a Son in law, and now my Father. In addition, plenty of second hand grief of dear friends who have lost someone. My husband always reminds me that the older we get the more accustomed we will become to this painful fact of life. I am also continuing to learn the importance of forgiveness. Human relationships normally do not just glide happily along with ease. They take determination and the grace to understand that we are all broken in some way. They take work. It is why we say “Rest in Peace’ to those who have passed on and are finished with their work in this life. I truly believe the two most important reasons I am here , is to learn and grow and at the top of the curriculum, is love and forgiveness. There are no life lessons more valuable than this. Not in my book.


It was a day not much unlike any other day in the dead of winter in Staten Island New York. I had been busy all day doing the things one does when your kids are school age. Get them off to school, go shopping, clean house, bathe the dog, after school homework, cook dinner, family time, get kids ready for bed etc. The day was coming to a close and I realized I had not had my daily run. It was a crucial element of my daily routine. Not only did it keep me in shape, it was the time of day when I was alone with my thoughts and I worked out all of life’s problems in my mind, came to decisions, reflected on my blessings and much more. It was my alone time, my prayer time, my meditation time. I looked forward to it with great anticipation. Therefore rarely did the weather keep me from it. Of course I was in great physical shape then and the pounding of my feet on the pavement did not produce the creaks and moans that such an activity would produce in this present day. My muscles were strong and could support my joints much better back then. There were times when I literally felt like I was flying 6 inches off the ground when I ran. It was a wonderful time. Even in the dreaded summer months, which I have never been a fan of, I would go out after dark when the sun set and run the track at a nearby high school so I could do speed laps and keep water handy on the bench to guzzle after each lap. Winters where no different. Rain sleet or snow I was out there doing my run.

This was one such winter evening that I will never forget. Not because anything happened of consequence, but because of what that run felt like. The sights, sounds and smells and the feeling that lives eternal in my mind because of its magic in the moment.

I began the process of dressing for a frigid winter run. It may have been pretty low in the teens if my memory serves me right. Leggings under sweatpants, two pairs of socks under my running shoes. Layered tops, not too confining, but plenty of layers, thick gloves , warm cap and a scarf wrapped around my face to protect my skin from the biting wind.  Vaseline to protect whatever skin was still exposed . Down the stairs I went out into the freezing winter night. Hopped in the car and drove over to the school about a mile or so away. It had been a day of freezing rain earlier in the day and the ice had covered the already several inches of snow that blanketed everything. The temps had dropped drastically, earlier in the evening and froze everything in it’s place.

On days when I had longer runs planned I skipped the track and ran on the sidewalk around the perimeter of the high school. This was my plan this night. The cold and wind would slow me down so a steady long run was on my agenda. As I pulled up to the school to park my car I realized the ambience my run would be blessed with that evening. As I stepped out of the car I noticed the palpitating silence. No sound but yet the quiet had a sound. The chain link fence around the school was a glistening sheet of solid ice all the way around. The trees along the path of the sidewalk were something out of a magical fairyland. Every branch from the thickest to the tiniest was fully covered with ice right to its tip. It was a stunning world of glass. Everything was covered and I mean everything that was not moving. I stood there in amazement gazing at this awe inspiring sight. I pulled the scarf from my face for a few seconds and inhaled the frosty winter air. It felt so cleansing. As I looked up I realized what had been illuminating the icy environment around me like a prism. The moon was big, and white and the night was clear. Stars could be seen dotting the sky. Sporadic street lights around the school added to the illumination of the ice world making it glisten even more. I began to run and all I could think about was how lucky I was to live in a world where God allowed the harshest conditions to create such beauty. Where both hardship and blessing could abide in the same place and at the same moment. Winter can be cold and dark and brutal yet at the same time can be so beautiful if you have eyes to see it. Much like life. I will never forget that run. I think it is ingrained in my memories because it is one of the earlier ones I have of learning to be in the moment. I have had many such moments since that time and the older I get the more I am learning about being present in the moment. To feel, see and experience every drop of beauty that moment has to offer. I don’t think I solved any problems, or made any major decisions that night. I think I just was ecstatically grateful.

Letting Go

 When I became a mother, I entered into a whole new existence. No longer did everything center on me. I moved to a place where everything centered around my children. They became my reason for living, and protecting them from the harsh realities of life was instinctual. But as they grew, I learned that you couldn’t protect them from pain, sadness, disappointment, hardship and even suffering because in this life, at some point, they are

At some point when my girls reached young adulthood, I had to face a hard truth. That it was time for them to make their own decisions and I had to let go of control. My role would be different. It would be about sitting on the sidelines of their lives and cheering them on. Watching them make mistakes sometimes and praying that they would make it through the consequences of those mistakes and learn from them. I remember that time. It was a feeling of freedom, relief and fear all mixed into one. But as the years went on and I watched them forge their way through life and create families of their own, it became easier and easier to relax, to trust and rest in the knowledge that I did my best as a Mom and actually raised good women. Watching their successes, their joys and their triumphs is one of life’s greatest pleasures. But, they would have to walk through some of their own fires in life and watching them get singed and even burned sometimes was painful for me as well, but continuing to be there, to help wrap up the burns, was my new role, not to prevent them.

Life brings more hardship for some than it does others. It is just the way it is. You never know in advance what cards will be dealt to you until you are staring at them in your hand. And there is no giving them back. You have to play the hand you are dealt; there is no other way.

It is this reality that brought me to a new place recently as a parent, to walk some ground I had never walked before on my life’s journey. A blazing fire broke out in the life of one of my adult children that had made the brush fires up to that point almost inconsequential, as her life was ripped open due to the sudden, and unexpected death of her still very young husband. And suddenly in the blink of an eye I was the parent of a little child again. A woman who is strong resilient and fiercely independent, was instantly transformed in my eyes into the little girl with the big brown eyes and pigtails who’s body I picked up and ran to the hospital with when she fell off of a wall and hit her head. The little girl who’s tears I wiped, and who I rocked and sang to and comforted all those years ago. I was not rusty. I was not at a loss as to how to react for it was instinctual. For months my life drifted quietly into the background and suddenly again I was waking up everyday asking myself what I needed to do for her this day.  

It’s funny how that happens in times of crisis. Real crisis, not the everyday bumps and bruises that we all need to experience to make it successfully in this life. The big, things, the tragic things. You recognize those things, when you see that strong responsible person that you raised unable to get up and brush themselves off. Not that they don’t want to, they literally can’t. You just know and you unquestionably become the parent of that little child again, and the process begins again of slowly letting go, like when they took their first step, or faced that first day of school, or stood up to that bully in the school yard. You stand close, but you slowly let go, again, as they attempt to carve their way through whatever pain and tragedy brought them to that place where they needed their parents again in a way they had not in a very long time. Depending on the severity of the blow, 10 days 10 weeks 10 months 10 years, you patiently let go as slowly as they need you to until they are standing strong against the winds of life once again and you move from being a fortress, a supporter, a guide to becoming more of a spectator of their journey, their biggest fan, smiling on the sidelines of their lives as you watch them soar. 

There is a memory burned into my soul that will be with me until the day I die. In fact there are a few memories like that related to this recent tragedy in my daughter’s life, some are hard to revisit as they are dark and sad. But this particular is neither happy, nor sad. It is just profound, and speaks to this very topic. It is the memory of moving through the airport, my husband and I, with the most precious and fragile cargo in tow. Our daughter and two Grandsons. Bringing them from their home in California where they lost the most important person in their lives, to rest, recover and grieve their loss in our home under our loving care. Their eyes empty of emotion and reddened with tears, a look of utter despair and ultimate trust in us, as we gently held their grieving hearts in our loving arms. Going through the motions of a process they had gone through many times, in happier times and for happier reasons. Moving mechanically, shoulders slumped, Mom clutching her boys, sons clutching their Mom and us, walking behind them with careful eyes on their every move, every facial expression, ready to pounce on their every fragile need. On the plane sitting strategically across my from my daughter, watching her clutching the remains of her deceased husband to her chest and waiting for signs of panic, knowing flying was difficult for her, even under the happiest of circumstances. Reaching across the aisle holding her hand with a lump in my throat. These memories will be with me forever. It was when I was called again to be that mother, before the letting go the first time.

Many months later I ponder the process of the past six months, as I watch her walk through the various stages of grief and I am struck with the realization that life sometimes comes full circle. Sometime we need to repeat processes. It has been a time of letting go just a little and then running to pick her up off the pavement and then letting go again. I am still very needed at this stage in her journey and it’s fine with me. In fact it’s an honor, and as she grows stronger in her journey there will be lots of letting go, again and again and again.  

By: JLE September 13, 2017

Tribute to My Son in law .

For those of you who did not personally know my son in law Jerry Thompson, here is a synopsis of who he was . The son of a mother from South Korea and Father who’s family are from the Bahamas , he grew up in the Bronx, of NYC. As one of his closest business associates put it, he was uniquely American . A melting pot of heritage, growing up without privilege, who followed his dreams, put his talents to use to carve out a successful life. Jerry was a self taught genius in the world of technology. In this tech world, He built things. Things that I could not begin to explain or understand . He put his talents to use in an evolutionary journey that took him from the computer screen of his tiny Jersey apartment, to building his own business which would eventually land him a position as CTO of Successful, LA based, online advertising and technology company . His name was known by countless people who had worked with him , in the music and technology industry. He was respected and liked for his calm, kind demeanor and his undying willingness to solve problems and help others .

His family is proud of his success but most cherished Jerry for his love and commitment to his family and friends. Jerry was loyal, dependable and committed. His wife and sons are a testament to that. We will forever hear his laugh, remember the things he used to say, and see the love he planted in the eyes of his boys . The world did not have him long enough. Rest In Peace, my dear son in law .

Til we see you again .


Written : February 25, 2017

Growing up in the Sixties

When my maternal grandmother was still alive, I would occasionally go have tea with her as a young woman. One of the most charming memories I have is of sitting in her kitchen and hearing her talk about life in her youth. I still find it fascinating when my parents talk about the past, how life was different for them. I find it a little sad however that as they age their memories begin to fade and I relate, because it seems the older I get the less details of my childhood I can recall.

This is what motivates me to write this. I wish I had more opportunity to talk to my Grandkids about my life. Unfortunately a good part of their growing years have involved Grandma being a long distance relative. When I do see them and have the opportunity to talk to them the focus is more on me catching up with what is going on their lives. Thank goodness for today’s technology. I can see their lives unfold on their parents Facebook pages, and though the teenagers are too busy to talk to Grandma on the phone, they will answer my texts and occasionally chat me up for a bit. I know when I was a teenager, I liked seeing my Grandmother when she came to visit, but sitting and listening to stories about her past did not interest me much until I became a young adult in my twenties. So I hope I have the same to look forward to with my Grandchildren. In the meantime I have my favorite means of leaving my legacy for them. My writing. This piece in addition to being recorded in this blog will also be printed and put in a special binder (the old fashioned way), I am creating specifically for that purpose. For my Grandchildren.

So being born in the 50’s despite what you might think, I don’t have memories of poodle skirts saddle shoes and do-op music. I was a baby, a toddler, a preschooler. That was my parent’s world. By the time I reached the age where the culture of the day would be indelibly imprinted in my memories of childhood, the new decade brought about a big change. The 60’s revolution. Growing up I was influenced by the Hippie mentality, although I was not a rebellious child so I grew up what I like to call a fringe Hippie. Embracing the fashion, the music and the lingo, but not the drugs, the promiscuity or protesting of the establishment. But that didn’t come until my adolescence anyway.

In my young childhood, the decade was still young and the shift from the world of American families striving for Father knows Best and leave it to Beaver families was still in force. Although behind the doors of my home we were far from that kind of family. But that is another subject. But I saw this world around me, in other households and for me it represented the norm.

As you know I grew up with four younger sisters, considerably younger, therefore other than the time and attention I would give to devote to them for my occasional amusement, they did not provide me with playmates my own age.

When I was indoors alone in my room, I would listen to children’s records on my record player, read books like Black Beauty and Little women, and oh how I loved my “Highlights” magazine for kids. I would sing constantly, sometimes in front of the mirror, and imagine a lot. Later around 11 or 12, I would find the love of writing I have to this day.

But like most kids in the early 60’s the outdoors was my playground. Friends lived right on my block, and the next block. There was no need for parents to arrange playdates, or drive me to a friend’s house. Kids I knew in school remained just that. Kids I knew in school. I never saw them outside of school. If I happened to have friend a few blocks away we walked to each other houses, or to a central location where the kids in the neighborhood would congregate. Daily out door fun included swinging on your own swing set, or someone else’s, playing games in the street such as hopscotch, kickball, tag, hide and seek. Or playing Jacks or Barbie dolls on someone’s porch. Walking up the street to the neighborhood family grocer, who happened to be an uncle of mine was always exciting, buying a piece of candy, or doing an errand for your parents. Then there was the ice cream man. He would come around ringing his bell, and everyone would scatter to beg Mom for money for ice cream. Riding bikes was another activity I loved about as much as swinging.

And then there were the nearby woods. How kids loved to find their own secret place to build forts, or swing on a rope swing across the swamp. I can remember dozens of my friends doing that at one spot we had just a few yards into a wooded area off our street. I don’t remember doing it myself, just watching. We also had a nearby field where we would go to pick blackberries, or push a raft across the swampy water. I have good and bad memories of that field, but again that is another story.

We had a lot of freedom, at least most kids did. As long as were home for dinner, and in before dark, parents didn’t worry about us much. Some older folks will tell you it was because the world was a safer place back then. I disagree. The world was not any safer. There was a lot of danger that lurked out in the world. Bad things happened to kids every day. The only difference between then and now is awareness. The evil has been exposed and is out in the open. It’s talked about, kids are taught to beware, we take lots of precautions to protect our kids against the evil in the world. Back then, still clinging to the Leave it Beaver facade, we lived in denial. Predators like pedophiles, kidnappers, mentally ill folks that might harm your child, or influence them negatively were only whispered about. Such ideas were swept under the rug and even when these evils were uncovered in ones own family, the secret was kept locked up tighter than a drum. Child abuse and domestic violence were things that were kept behind closed doors and no one felt it was any of their business.

As the sixties wore on I approached adolescence and the teen years. These years brought a loss of interest in some of the childhood games and more of an interest in pop music, collecting your favorite vinyl records, walking around with your transistor radio, bike riding on the back of the boys banana seat bike, playing more grownup games in the street like, softball although we still played kickball, and I still played with Jacks through my teen years. The boys played football and the girls chatted and watched and talked about the boys.

Occasionally the cool parents would let all the kids hang out at their houses. These homes were normally equipped with a finished basement, which was common in suburban Staten Island NY homes in the 60’s. There we would listen to vinyl records of the latest bands, the girls would dance, the boys would play pool if the family had a pool table, or have a Jam session with guitars and drums.

We also began finding these secret places. Like under the Highway overpass, tucked way up top where we couldn’t be seen. Here was where kids smoked their first cigarette, stole their first kiss, sipped their first sip of Boones Farm Strawberry wine, Sorted out our very dramatic spats with one another. We told scary stories of urban legends of which there were always a few.

As I advanced from the early teen years into my high school years the sixties were coming to an end and the 1970s was fast approaching. Leaving Junior high behind meant girls were no longer required to wear skirts and dresses to school. I am not sure which year but sometime in high school girls were allowed to wear jeans. So I hung up my gogo boots and mini skirts for bell bottom hip hugger jeans. I wore my hair shoulder length and pin straight parted down the middle. Think Marsha Brady. That was pretty much me, without the perfect blended family though. My first year in high school was kind of turbulent. For some reason my address did not allow me to be zoned for the same high school as friends on the same street. I guess we lived on the dividing line. So I started high school with no one I knew from my neighborhood and we were all pretty tight on my block and one block over. So I got into a bad habit of playing hooky and not going to school often for many months. But even my friends that went to the other high school did the same. We would all meet at the bus stop, no school buses, we took chartered city buses to school since Staten Island was a borough of New York City. Then we would go hang out wherever we could hide from truant officers that patrolled the streets for kids skipping school, including gas station bathrooms. Yuck. But at that time adults would question you if you were loitering around during school hours. So we had to stay out of sight. These were the dangerous years of my youth. Hitch hiking was a popular thing among Staten Island teens my age. I am ashamed to say that as a group we hopped in the cars of many a stranger who was cool enough to give us rides to wherever we wanted to go in our skipping school days. Occasionally we would get to hang out in the home of someone whose parents were both working. This was rare however. Eventually I got caught but the good outcome was that I convinced my Mother I did it all because I was so out of place in my high school and would do so much better if I could go to the school where the rest of my friends went. So my Mother found a way to get me transferred. I finally cracked down and took school more seriously after that. And so did my friends, or at least some of them.

I was an average student in high school. I could have done better but like many, I didn’t apply myself 100 percent. Honestly most of what preoccupied me from my early teens were boyfriends of which I had several steady ones throughout my teens. At that time it’s what you did, you didn’t just date boys, you went steady. We just called it, “going out with” someone but it meant exclusive, or you were just friends. No in between, at least not where I was from. Truthfully as I look back, it was very restricting for a teenage girl. To serious too soon, but it was what we did.

As for music, listening to music was not like it is today. At home you had records, outside of home you had the radio. When I was sixteen my Birthday present was the Beatles Abbey Road album. It was all I wanted. I was a huge Beatle fan. I loved the British bands, the pop bubble gum music, and Motown. I was not a big fan of the heavy metal rock that was coming on the scene in the seventies. It was all too loud, dark and dissonant for me. I preferred brighter music that made me happy, lyrics that told a good story and harmony. Later in my teens I became a big fan of the oldies, which then were the do- op songs of the fifties. I knew them all. I remember a station that played the oldies consistently. And on Staten Island there was a sweet shop that was still in business from back in the fifties, that had all the oldies on a jukebox.

Unlike a lot of Baby Boomers, I did not go to concerts or teen clubs. They were around but it was just not in my world at the time. Once I was taking public transportation to leave my neighborhood with friends it was to go to the beach, or occasionally shopping at some mall. But that was rare. I rarely had money for that until I was out of high school and working. We didn’t go to the mall to just hang out. That came to be popular a decade or so later.

I got my driver’s license around age 17, I believe. I passed my first road test. I was given an old 1950- something Ford I think. It was baby blue. It lasted me a few years. I didn’t take it far, to and from school and later to the ferry or train station along my commute from Staten Island to Manhattan for work. My high school boyfriend had a Ford thunderbird convertible and I spent a lot of time in that car for sure.

My later teen years lead to driving around with my boyfriend to meet friends at popular hang out areas. Usually down by the beach. That involved drinking out of the back of someone’s trunk where the alcohol was kept, until the police cruised around and you shut the trunk and leaned on it with an innocent smile. I was not a big drinker however. My first experience with liquor was trying scotch out of my parent’s liquor cabinet in a tall Tupperware glass and getting very sick after spinning around the living room to make sure it took. I never really liked drinking much after that. I did pick up the nasty habit of smoking cigarettes at age 16 which thankfully I gave up at age 24 and never looked back.

Back at the end of the 1960’s and early 1970’s not all girls were encouraged to go to college. Some were, but it was assumed by many girls like me who came from lower middle class families that we would go to work to help the family out when we got out of high school. College was for the girls from more upper middle class families. Truthfully it was never even discussed in my home. I really was never told by anyone I even had that option. So In my last two years of high school I chose classes that prepared me for what was called a commercial diploma, as opposed to an Academic diploma (college bound kids). These included typing, bookkeeping, record keeping and stenography. Yea stenography. You probably don’t even know what that is. But June of my senior year I had already been sent on a job interview in Manhattan for a big firm and got the job. I graduated high school in June of 1972 and in July I started my full time job in the big city. The rest is history.

So this is a glimpse of what growing up was like in my day. I am sure my great grandchildren will grow up in quite a different world but it is my hope that these memories written down will pass down through the generations and keep the memories alive for years to come.

By: JLE September 2017

So a few weeks ago, Mommy tells me we are going over my other Mommy Danielle’s house. I love going there, When she tells me I just can’t stop running and jumping all around. I love to see my Jay and Tyler. So this one day we go over in the car and when we walk in her front door, as I am wondering why Mom is carrying me in this time, it hits me. I smell it right away. There is another dog in this house. What’s happening !! I think to myself, are they OK ?, do I have to hurt somebody ? I start trying to wiggle out of Mommy’s arms as we walk into the living room and there he is. Sitting in my old crate no less. He’s smaller than me, but not by much, and he is black and white like that energizer bunny that lives next door, Sophie. Great another puppy. And I am sure this one will want me to play too. But Wait, I hope I am still their favorite. So all my loving human parents start soothing me and telling me to meet Marley. He comes out and naturally heads right for me. We circle around smelling butts, ok not bad so far. They let us out in the yard right away, and I start marking all my spots. This guy has got to know I am still chief around her. He pees, I pee on top of it, he pees again and I pee again. Then I think, I’ll show him, I will poop over here. Game over. So he is of course more energetic than me. But a little more laid back than Sophie. He tries to play and I give him a few half hearted playful gestures in return. Don’t get me wrong I am not an old dog. I am only four. And I certainly don’t lack energy of my own. I can run like the wind, and love playing games with my humans. I just don’t have a lot of experience playing with other dogs especially puppies who don’t know the rules. Ya know personal space ? I have the same problem with tiny humans. I don’t like being trapped or cornered and don’t like my head and face probed. So Marley doesn’t do much of that , and when he does go there, I give him my growl and he lays down. Ok I think I can live with this. But I gotta tell you, he’s got a fascination for some strange things. In the yard he likes to dig everything. And he’s got these giant paws. I don’t like to get dirt in my tiny paws, I don’t get how he likes doing that. And he eats everything. Sticks, dirt, rocks, mulch. Blaah. I mean I like chewing on a good stick sometimes but I don’t swallow them. He eats grass too. That I can relate to, I like a good yard salad once in awhile. And this puppy sure loves toys. He’s got a ton of them all over the floor. I just walk by and give them the side eye, yea I have a ton of those too big deal. Umm excuse me ? That is my bed you are laying in At Mommy Danielle’s. Ok whatever. Then he comes to my house one day. I have a basket of toys and you would think he was a pup in doggie treat store. He pulls them all out all over and starts acting like he never saw toys before. Sigh. Kids. And my kibble dish is always on the floor next to my water dish. He heads right for it and eats the whole bowl. As for me it can sit there for days. I would rather wait for Mom to sit on the couch and hand feed it to me. He can eat it, there is always more in the closet. We spend a lot of time outside when we visit because everyone is always asking if he has to go potty and hovering over him. What’s up with that ? Well all in all Marley is not too bad. We had a few nice naps together. Well together sort of. I certainly am not into spooning with him but I will share Mommy Danielle’s couch with him . I can tell Mommy Danielle and Jay love me just the same even with Marley around. Tyler comes home to meet him tonight. I know it will make his face smile and that makes me happy. I missed Tyler while he was in California. I sure hope he will still play chase with me now that Marley is around.