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Archive for September, 2020

You hear this cliche’ all the time . Everyone seems to have an opinion on what’s wrong with the world . What they mean is what’s wrong with us . The Human race. We all think we know . We all feel we have the answers and all we truly have is opinions . As we forge through this journey of our existence in the world, from generation to generation old problems are solved and new ones emerge and we never eradicate hate, violence, bigotry, fear , do we ? We remain divided and at odds with one another because it’s always someone else’s fault . Well of course it is , because we cannot help ourselves from believing we are not part of the problem . We tell ourselves we are right they are wrong . We are not afraid, angry, judgmental, and prideful . Other people are . What each and every human being fails to realize is that everyone one of us are exactly that to some degree . Because regardless of the physical strength we posses or the intellectual knowledge we gain, The EGO is what’s wrong with us . It is at the root of all our conflicts over our racial, religious, cultural and ideological differences . The Ego tell us we are ok and the other guy is not . EGO feeds our fears, our anger and pride . And it is at the very heart of the human spirit. It’s not a physical or intellectual problem, it’s a spiritual one .

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Remembering

As I get older, like others my age I complain more and more about my memory failing me. But regardless, a Mom never forgets the details of the birth of her first child. Today marks that event 43 years ago. What a child I was myself. Looking back it is like I was someone else. Life tends to transform you that way. At twenty years old, it was the most exciting, scary and amazing thing that had happened to me up to that point. I can still remember feeling the first signs of her life inside my womb. Saying it was surreal is an understatement. Along with the anticipation as the months ensued, of being a mother and raising a real life human being. There was so much I had yet to discover about the immense responsibility this would be. And when the day came I can recall it all. Waking up discovering I had broken my water. Sitting on the couch timing my contractions with her father. Trying to recall and put in to practice all the advice and instructions I had been given up to that point. I wanted to do it right.

Luckily labor was short for a first child . 6-7 hours from start to finish. Remembering that this was 1975 I chuckle at how the process has changed in 42 years. I was put in a hospital room pretty much alone for the labor part with someone checking on me now and then. As awful as this sounds I remember my wrists actually being secured to the bed rails . I think it was so that I did not pull out my IV everytime I would have a contraction and tend to want to sit up and roll over. Ugh, have times changed. Fathers were not present there for the delivery. It was a new concept. And when the time came to push I remember being whisked away to the delivery room and put to sleep. After that, nothing, until I woke up as a Mom in recovery.

Seeing her for the first time was like being handed a living baby Doll. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. And she was mine. And there began a lifetime of unconditional love, sacrifice, pride, hard work, moments of heartache and  joys beyond measure. Looking back I am grateful for every single teachable moment. I learned as much as she did in these 43 years. Through trial and error, plenty of mistakes but thankfully enough successes to get her through to adulthood. Nothing will grow you like parenting. I am thankful for every second of it. And seeing your child become an adult  you are proud of is one of the most rewarding things life can bring.

I am now the mother of two beautiful adult daughters. It is a very different experience than raising them was but equally as rewarding and challenging all at the same time. I would not trade this role for anything in the world.

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Never Forget 2

I’ve been thinking today about how abundantly the term “Never Forget” is used today in memory of 911 by people of all walks of life.

It’s another one of those catchy slogans that I myself use, but normally don’t like to use at random because It’s important to me when I say something, it is not up to the interpretation of others like many of our catchy slogans today. It’s that thing I have about not liking labels which I have talked about before. So I stopped to think what I personally mean when I say “Never Forget”. It’s not just a statement of remembrance to mourn those who perished. To think about their families. To feel sad about the loss. It also isn’t about revenge or a vow to carry a grudge toward a certain group of people. When I say never forget, I mean this. I will not forget the horrors that resulted from the lack of regard for human life in the heart of of those terrorists. . I will not forget the sickening result that comes from humans believing that violence is the answer to our differences. I will not forget what can happen when human hearts are twisted with hate for one another over religion, politics, ideologies, grudges over past oppressions in our history. When I say never forget, it means today, and every day I remember what happens when we cannot learn to solve our disagreements with peaceful communication and respect for one another. Human life is sacred. Taking life is unfortunately a horrible reality sometimes necessary to protect the innocents . Its awful that we must use violence to protect ourselves and others but the act of violence against the innocent is the most despicable of human acts. I look around, and see all the justification for violence, sometimes it even sounds reasonable, empathetic, understanding. And then I think of this day, and what hate can lead to. That’s what “Never Forget” means to me,

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